(Over the next 10 weeks, as I work my way through Story 101, a lot of my posts will come from prompts and subjects we’re discussing.)
Consider this :: what is it that keeps you up at night? What could you talk about every single day for the rest of your life? What do you want to shout from the rooftops so everyone will know?
What runs electric through your veins?
I have to admit – I stared at these words for a long time, slow panic rising in me. Lots of things keep me up at night right now – and all the uncertainties and struggles began dancing around my head in broad daylight.
But out of the chaotic thoughts came countless moments from my memories – me, a heap on the floor and tears in my eyes and heart laid bare. And I knew.
I shout from the rooftops that I love Him – shamelessly, fiercely, desperately – because He is all together perfect.
I don’t understand so much, but I love Him.
Some days it scares me because I live in a world that wants to make it seem foolish and pathetic and ignorant to love Him. Sometimes the Church has earned those criticisms; often she hasn’t. And it is hard to live in a world that seems hostile to what you love. But still I love Him.
And I shout from the rooftops that He loves you, me, all of us, and if you do not love Him, perhaps you have not really seen Him? And I suggest this with not a shred of condemnation or shame, but rather to stir up hope, to urge you to keep looking.
Electric through my veins is the desire for people to encounter His presence, to catch one glimpse of His eyes gazing into them – seeing all and loving all. If we do not have Him, we have nothing.
And I shout from the rooftops that He is holy, and it is ok that we are not because He is committed to making us holy, even while we are broken. When He corrects, it may be uncomfortable, but it still feels like grace. And if it feels more like shame, then maybe just wait a little longer before making any changes? Shame produces some nasty fruit, nothing like what He offers.
For the rest of my life, it comes back to Him, again and again. And I know sometimes He seems far and sometimes He seems unreasonable and sometimes He simply makes no sense. But don’t give up. He is never truly far. And I know some days this journey is just so, SO hard. But don’t give up.
I shout from the rooftops that He is worth it. I believe it with every fiber of my being. I love Him.
And He loves us – this is my loudest shout of all.