There is listening to understand and listening to defend.
If I am listening to understand, then I will hear the entirety of what you have to say without cutting you off to interject my own opinions.
If I am listening to understand, I will not be dismissive of your reality, even though I may have had a different experience.
If I am listening to understand, I will not automatically counter your thoughts with all the reasons you are wrong.
If I am listening to understand, I will not make assumptions about your heart, character, or personal convictions; instead, I will lovingly seek clarity where it’s needed.
If I am listening to understand, I will respond with thoughtful questions that show my desire to draw out the essence of what matters to you.
If I am listening to understand, I will take time to ponder what you have to say instead of promptly brushing it aside and moving on.
It’s not easy to listen this way, especially if you are challenging me, convicting me, or calling me into territory I am unfamiliar with or uncertain of. It’s not even a little bit easy.
But it’s necessary if I want to establish trust with you and if I want to walk alongside you. It’s necessary if I want to value your heart. It’s necessary if we ever hope to make a positive difference in this world.
This is so true. Listening is an art that needs to be practiced. Thanks for the words of wisdom!
–Joan 🙂