Tag Archives: choosing

Day 10: Rest Days (31 Days of Simple Truths)

Image Source: Unsplash

Image Source: Unsplash

All my life, I heard about the importance of a Sabbath rest – a weekly day set aside for rest, but I never regularly experienced this bliss until just over a year ago.

We started going to church on Saturday nights, something I previously thought would feel weird. I was so wrong. It was the complete opposite of weird. It was perfect.

What used to happen was that Saturday was for catching up on all the things that hadn’t been done all week: grocery shopping, house cleaning, errand running, etc. Then, Sunday was spent at church. And then it was Monday, and I was constantly tired. Maybe church is restful for some people. I don’t know. And I’m not suggesting that I didn’t like going to church. But it was a scheduled thing, somewhere you needed to be, and in my case, a place where I still had responsibilities and expectations to meet.

All that shifted for us when we went to a church with a Saturday night service. Saturday mornings, I did the grocery shopping, midday I took care of things around the house, in the evening we went to church. And Sunday? We rested. We played. If we felt like it, we did a project we’d been trying to get to. And by the time Monday rolled around, I was refreshed. I stopped dreading Mondays. Who knew?

We’ve moved now, and we need to find a new church. There seems to be a shortage of Saturday night services in the area. And we’re trying to figure out what to do.

But something is different for me. And the issue isn’t really one of whether Saturday or Sunday services work better. The real issue is that I’ve discovered the bliss of an entire day set aside to rest every single week. And I’m not going back to the way life was before. Whatever day of the week it has to be we’ll have to figure out. But this is the simplest, yet most profound truth I know right now: Rest is everything. It is essential. It’s worth fighting for. It’s worth saying no to things for. It’s worth whatever you have to do to make space for it in your life.

Do yourself a favor, and schedule some regular rest into your week.

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Filed under 31 Days of Simple Truths, Change, Church, Rest

31 Days of Simple Truths: Choosing (Day 1)

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Image: James Barker/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I’ve gone round and round in my brain about participating in Write 31 Days this year. I really want to, but we’ve just moved, life is crazy, I need to go easy on myself…

I wanted to be deep and profound and figure out how to make a cool little graphic for my series like all the other lovely ones I’ve seen. I even purchased an app to do it, and it straight up will not open. I have no idea why. I don’t understand. I spent an hour trying to figure it out before throwing in the towel.

I figured it was a sign that it was all too much, and I was out of my mind for even considering it.

Then I felt the familiar whisper of the Holy Spirit: Keep it simple.

Ugh. I am not good at simple. I never have been. Even when I resolve I’m going to, somehow, I have a knack for complicating it.

But I need simple right now. Desperately.

So, these will not be long posts. I am in a new season, and I am looking to lay the foundation for what’s ahead of us, to drive down the stakes that will hold us steady. I am looking for simple truths in every day—things that will anchor my soul.

And today this is my truth: One of the most beautiful things about a new season is the power to choose what can come with me from the old season. If I don’t want it anymore, I don’t have to bring it with me. I get to let go.

So here’s to releasing burdens, fears and old patterns. Here’s to scattering the unhealthy things to be carried off with the leaves on the wind. Here’s to loosening my grip on all the dead things and embracing the beauty of bare branches, ready  for deep rest in preparation to receive new life.

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Filed under Beauty, Change

The Act of Choosing Every Day

We have spent the last few days celebrating seven years of marriage. Seven! We enjoyed a much needed, relaxing, kid-free weekend (hallelujah!), and then yesterday–the official day–we let the kids in on the fun of celebrating with us.

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Anniversaries of any kind invite so much reflection, and this has been no exception. My heart is full as I realize the strength and gift of what we have. I would by no means claim to be an expert, but I think I have realized one very important truth for building a healthy marriage: you have the opportunity every single day to choose each other all over again, to turn towards each other even when you’d rather turn away.

I always wondered how people could say they had just drifted apart. How does that happen? How do years go by and suddenly there is nothing where there was once a loving relationship? And I think it has something to do with this choosing.

Our responses and interactions with each other in the flurry of ordinary, every day living either add a brick towards forming a wall between us or they bring us a step closer into deeper connection with each other. It is not enough to choose each other as a spouse and have a pretty ceremony and say our vows. We have to go on choosing each other every single day.

When I don’t take him granted and I express my appreciation for all the little ways he helps carry the load, I am choosing him.

When he hurts or disappoints me and rather than attacking him, I express myself with humility and grace, I am choosing him.

When I hurt or disappoint him and I swallow my pride to say I’m sorry and make it right, I am choosing him.

When I recognize he is weary and stressed and I say, “Hey, why don’t you go for a run?,” I am choosing him.

Again and again, countless ways, I can move closer to his heart or I can step away.

We haven’t always gotten this right. There have been seasons when poor communication or overwhelming circumstances were allowed to build a wall between us, and it was tremendous work to tear that thing down. And I can see how something like that could grow insurmountable to where it seems completely hopeless. Those chasms can get harder and harder to cross.

But in the opposite vein, even when vulnerability and humility seemed the painful option, I have never ever regretted choosing that path. It becomes easier to choose that step now rather than deal with the wall later.

And with this understanding, I have a renewed passion for the next season of our marriage, a renewed commitment to being even more intentional about choosing this amazing man all over again, every single day. There are so many ways we can still say, “I do,” and I am looking forward to finding them.

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Filed under Covenant Relationships, Hope, Marriage