Tag Archives: truth

Day 28: Embrace the Wondering (31 Days of Simple Truths)

Copy-of-DSC_0677-1024x681Over the past two years, my spiritual journey has taken me to unexpected places—deep into the heart of my own questions, doubts, and frustrations.

It scared me. I’ve watched people “wrestle with theology,” until suddenly, they didn’t want anything to do with God or church or Christianity. I thought I’d made peace with my own questions; I didn’t expect them to re-surface. What had I missed?

I didn’t want to lose my faith, but I couldn’t stop the unraveling. I grabbed hold of familiar truths only to find them crumbling in my hands. Many things I had been taught, had wholeheartedly believed, simply didn’t hold up against the reality I faced.

Several months ago, I wept my way through worship once again. I felt incredibly lost, when I sensed the breath of the Spirit on my heart: Don’t you remember who I am? I’m the One who guides you into all truth. And how do you find truth? You ask questions. I’m guiding your questions. It’s Me.

I can’t describe the burden lifted from me in that moment.

The Holy Spirit guides our questions. Have you ever pondered that? It’s a breathtaking reality. Doubt is not always a bad thing. Sometimes He wants us to doubt that thing we’ve clung to because it’s become entangled with something He never meant for us to be anchored to. Sometimes He wants to unravel our foundations, so He can build better ones.

Today, I’m over at The Art of Fear Not with Tammy Hendricksmeyer, writing about leaning into the questions and trusting the Holy Spirit to guide us into all truth. Join  me over there for the rest!

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Filed under 31 Days of Simple Truths, Change, Faith

31 Days of Simple Truths: Choosing (Day 1)

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Image: James Barker/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I’ve gone round and round in my brain about participating in Write 31 Days this year. I really want to, but we’ve just moved, life is crazy, I need to go easy on myself…

I wanted to be deep and profound and figure out how to make a cool little graphic for my series like all the other lovely ones I’ve seen. I even purchased an app to do it, and it straight up will not open. I have no idea why. I don’t understand. I spent an hour trying to figure it out before throwing in the towel.

I figured it was a sign that it was all too much, and I was out of my mind for even considering it.

Then I felt the familiar whisper of the Holy Spirit: Keep it simple.

Ugh. I am not good at simple. I never have been. Even when I resolve I’m going to, somehow, I have a knack for complicating it.

But I need simple right now. Desperately.

So, these will not be long posts. I am in a new season, and I am looking to lay the foundation for what’s ahead of us, to drive down the stakes that will hold us steady. I am looking for simple truths in every day—things that will anchor my soul.

And today this is my truth: One of the most beautiful things about a new season is the power to choose what can come with me from the old season. If I don’t want it anymore, I don’t have to bring it with me. I get to let go.

So here’s to releasing burdens, fears and old patterns. Here’s to scattering the unhealthy things to be carried off with the leaves on the wind. Here’s to loosening my grip on all the dead things and embracing the beauty of bare branches, ready  for deep rest in preparation to receive new life.

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Filed under Beauty, Change

Restless Shifting

Photo by Jennifer Upton

Photo by Jennifer Upton

There is change coming.  So close I can almost taste it, not close enough to touch it.  Bumps of uncertainty lie in the path – possibilities of the change being delayed or perhaps not as smooth as we’d hoped.  But it is coming.  And I am restless.

Strange how a seemingly insignificant act can seem to trigger a chain reaction.  Last Wednesday, I went to get my haircut.  This alone was monumental because I haven’t been taking good care of myself.  Well, I’ve been trying, but mostly unsuccessfully.  Discouragement is a beast, and he was keeping me paralyzed.

Somehow I mustered up the will and made the appointment and set aside the money.  And on the way there, I resolved one more thing – when she asked how I was, I was going to tell her the truth.  Now, before you feel sorry for the unsuspecting hairdresser I might have bombarded, let me just say, this one is my friend.  I’ve known her for a lot of years; she was a bridesmaid in my wedding.  We don’t live close to her anymore, so I don’t see her often.  But I knew the truth would be safe with her if I could lay down my pride long enough to speak it.

Call me crazy if you like, but something powerful happened in the process of voicing my truth, allowing my own beauty to be poured into and most of all, receiving my friend’s words when she said, “Things are going to change. Soon.”  They were not the trite words of someone who didn’t know what else to say; they were spoken with the weight of knowing.  And within the next three days the wheels of change were set in motion.

And now we wait.  Some more.  But this time with a very bright light on the horizon.

The restlessness broods.  New questions come to replace the tired ones.  I discover (again) I am not my best self in these in-between seasons.  But I want to go into the new season healthy, with momentum, so I am making deliberate choices to pursue discipline with new fervor and to take hold of Rest even when she tries to be elusive.  Because afternoon tea and messy art projects and snuggles with my kids and lingering in my husband’s arms – these are the constants I can carry into the new season, however we get there, whenever we get there.

Can I offer you this encouragement?  Whatever approaching transition or change you face (because, remember – life is constantly cycling through seasons), find your anchor.  It may not be obvious.  It may not be easy.  But there is something in you that you carry in your heart from season to season.  Even if it is as simple as the daily ritual of slowing down to sip Earl Grey.  Find it.  Savor it.  There are things ingrained in your heart because it is a gift of God to you – the constants in the middle of life’s endless changing.

The restlessness may not leave all together, but it does not have to own us.

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Filed under Beauty, Hope, Waiting